How To Ask A Girl To Be Your Girlfriend

Hey guys, Matt here again, hollering from SIBG HQ here in sunny Baltimore. We have just welcomed another batch of new joiners just last weekend and it was a blast as usual. 🙂

Surprisingly, not a lot of those newbies were beginners in the seduction game, and indeed, there were a couple of guys who have predictably been able to get past the Attraction stage consistently. Intermediates in the game of seduction, they usually get stuck in the Comfort stage, unable to close the deal.

John K from Seattle, for example, has been going out with this 22 year old model with golden locks he had picked up in a bookstore four months ago. “Matt, I need help to close the deal,” he had told me.

Using fractionation lines when asking a girl to be your girlfriend will work wonders for you

Using fractionation lines when asking a girl to be your girlfriend will work wonders for you

Indeed, knowing how to ask a girl to be your girlfriend is pivotal to your success in the game of seduction. It marks the jump in the relationship from platonic to sexual – a step change which requires a lot more thinking than one would expect.

Invoking The Dark Rake – Not For Any Tommy, Dicky, And Harry

Followers of Derek Rake would probably invoke the Dark Rake Method at this stage, and it is worth noting that covert seduction techniques are more than apt here since the risk of failure is relatively high. Of course, techniques like fractionation can also be used in order to deepen desires and build deep emotional rapport which serves as the foundation for techniques like the Dark Rake.

(Of course, techniques like the Dark Rake can also be somewhat misused to control and manipulate women, but that’s another story altogether.)

We have got elaborate blueprints which we share here at the SIBG Knowledge Vault, but below are the few techniques that will increase your chances when you escalate from platonic to sexual.

Technique #1: Invoke jealousy

The biggest risk when you ask a girl to be your girlfriend is to be relegated to the dreaded “friend zone”. The surest way to avoid getting friend-zoned is to invoke jealousy.

I always tell my SIBG mentees that they will have to have multiple relationships in order to succeed in just one. It’s a problem when you are completely devoted to one girl; this greatly increases risk in many ways. You’ll be especially careful not to screw up, which means that you usually will. Also, putting all your eggs in one basket is a sure fire recipe for disaster.

By going out with multiple women at the same time, you want them to compete with each other for your attention and love. Since you have choices, you won’t get too hung up with one particular girl. This realization that you can cherry pick gives you the confidence and non-desperation that makes you über attractive to women.

When you’re coming from a position of power, then it doesn’t matter what you say to ask a girl to be your girlfriend. If she is already fighting for your affections, then she might just be the one who pops the question.

Technique #2: Fractionation

Fractionation is the devil's seduction technique?

Fractionation… the devil’s seduction technique?

Regular readers of will know that I am an unabashed fanboy of fractionation – really, there’s nothing really compares to its power when it comes to generating intense attraction inside a woman. The good news is that I have found (from both personal experience and also from my coaching clients as well as the members of the Baltimore Seduction Lair), if you “stitch” fractionation lines into your standard set of “how to ask a girl to be your girlfriend” question, then your chances of success will go up by at least 2-3x.

The topic of fractionation is well beyond the scope of this short SIBG guide, but in general it involves bringing the girl through emotional ups and downs rapidly through a carefully rehearsed series of verbatims, “loaded” statements and questions. Go to for more on fractionation as a seduction technique, but for the sake of completeness here’s how you can adapt the technique specifically in the context of asking a girl to be your girlfriend –

  • Disqualify her. “I have been thinking on bringing our relationship to the next level, but I’m not sure if this can actually work out….”
  • One step further would be to put her inside the friend-zone. “… and perhaps we should just remain friends.”
  • Make a subliminal suggestion. “When your dream guy finally agrees to be your boyfriend…” (subtly point at yourself) “… you will feel like you’re the happiest gal ever to walk the earth.”
  • Fractionate between positive and negative. “Imagine the fun being a couple, the fun things we do, and the precious time we spend together. But as with any relationships, there will be ups and downs, and we will go through sad times as well.”

For more (rather insidious!) mind control seduction techniques on how to manipulate (and emotionally enslave) a woman, click here.

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